Rearranging my 'closet'

Mylyfe

2012-02-07T12:53:00.001+05:30

The right to choose... Life... And freedom to exercise the right. Thats what makes my heart beat.. Thats where I feel glad to be alive.
Its not just blood that runs in my veins.. Its the urgency... The urge.. To live some more... Do something better than just non descript invisible existence. To make birds fly... and stars shine... For me.

The stubborness that I share with a single leaf of grass bent on growing on a concrete floor. To live in the now. Not like the grasshopper of an old story, but a true follower of now.
To claim... And reclaim my life ...

Livin the dream...

2012-01-28T14:49:00.001+05:30

Its a dream to live the life of your dreams....but many a times I forget that this life itself is a dream...
The concept of matrix was a hit not for no reason. The only difference is that here ...in this life, I just get alarmed into realising the truth by some preset wake up calls. Alarms that are designed to stop myself from kidding myself that this is all true..and is actually happening.
Nothing is true...nothing except the fact that this life, as i know it, and whatever it has for me, can go away at any moment. Depressing as it may sound, it is equally true.
The more I believe the myth, the deeper I am in the dream, the more alarmed I get when the alarm rings..
Shakespere said a lot of silly things, but the one where we're all actors and world's a stage was GENIUS. Okay maybe he didnt say anything silly! But the actor who actually starts to believe tht plot is the best actor and foolest of them all too..
True happiness and peace, something that I've been looking for since so long, can be attained only when I make best of this life while realising that this is all a myth.
Just like a movie can best be enjoyed when I realise that even though it might be based on a real incident...right now...its just a movie..

Its my time ! :)

2011-12-31T14:24:00.002+05:30

Time is a funny thing, time is also the best healer, time rules everything, time is one's greatest friend and worst enemy, its also the fourth dimension...but most importantly time is what we make of it.
As another year closes its performance today, and a new calender year preps it's tunes for us, we have to realize that the difference between time's music and noise really lies in our own heads.
Even though every second that passes will never come back, this, faux birthday reminds us the importance of each passing second...that is.. how precious it is to live in the present!
This is the time to make resolutions and keep them this time :) ... this is also an opening for a new hope. There's a quote from a movie, (I don't remember the name of which) saying, "Do not let the past dictate you, but let it be a part of who you will become". Every one makes mistakes, and what is life without mistakes!.. but there comes a time, when you have to be the grown up and take responsibility for those, learn from them and move on ...with time.. and life..and hope for God's sake we don't make another one ! :)
Anyway.. Hoping that with a new rise in the wave, a lot of last year's rubbish will wash off, and the beach of our life will shimmer with only new shiny shells, and white white sand...
Happy New Year 2012 !! ..and God Bless!

Learning the Art of Living - II

2011-12-25T19:04:00.000+05:30

Day III

If you want to remove the complaints from your life, its is very important to understand the Power-Responsibility cycle. The only people who complain about things are the ones who are not responsible for them.The person responsible will complain much less or not complain at all. If you dont want to complain about your life, or work, increase your feeling of belonging. Do more. As you will take more responsibility of your own life, you will reduce complains around it, and increase the power that you hold on it. Not only life...anywhere, wherever if you are more responsible, you automatically attain more power, whether at work, or at home, or even among your friends..
Think about what you can contribute to every moment!
Lessen the usage of 'try ' from your sentences. The more you commit, the more you'll perform, and success will be ensured.

DAY IV

ध्यानं मूलं गुरुमूर्त्य
पूजा मूलं गुरुपदम
मंत्र मूलं गुरुवाक्यम
मोक्ष मूलं गुरुकृपा
Meaning: Where God is your Guru, try to meditate and eventually become like your Guru. Walk on the path what your Guru has showed. Bring the meaning of your guru's words into your life as your mantra. And when you do all of that, your Guru's blessings are your nirvana.
Practice non violence..not only in action, but also in your speech, as sometimes, violent words can do more damage to a person than knife.
Of all the emotional or mental troubles that we go through, most are caused by our ego getting disturbed.Do not even let your good actions get to your ego, because then you're losing the point of the good action itself.
Man is a bundle of thoughts, wishes, dreams, fears and concerns. These are the things that make our mind so cluttered. Inculcating and increasing our tolerance, patience, encouraging good and courage makes our life simpler, which is a less stressful, easier way of living.

DAY V

एक पानी की बूँद, जब समुद्र में गिरती है, तो वो अपना अस्तित्व खोकर समुद्र ही बन जाती है .
वाही पानी की बूँद अगर कीचड में गिरती है, तो वो अपना अस्तित्व खोकर खीचड़ बन जाती है.
It is very important in life to decide, whom are you going to be with, and with whom are you going to be one with, to choose your Guru, your God.

Learnt how to perform Sudarshan Kriya at home.
Performed Disha Pranayam.

DAY VI

ध्यान, श्वास, और भावना को जोड़कर अगर हम कोई आसन करें तो वही योग कहलाता है.

Asanas to perform daily:
Titli aasan
Makar Asan
Bhujang aasan

Another food for thought:
We pray in our temples, believing the stone statues to have life, power, and asking for their blessings. Why don't we treat our own body, which is actually alive, with more respect! True God resides within us.

Learning the Art of Living - I

2011-12-22T23:18:00.002+05:30

Day 1:
Art of breathing: To breathe in the stomach, so that diaphragm gives enough space for the lungs to expand. Usually we use only 30% of our lungs' capacity, of which brain is the organ that needs circulated oxygen most.
Practiced: Ujjayyi Pranayam, Bhastrika Pranayam

Art of listening: To listen with your heart and your head. To be analytic yet emotional.

Day 2:
Where does the mind go? At any time mind is only in two things..in past memories, or in future planning and hypothesis...glorifying all good things and making the bad things worse. Our mind is super active, and that's how it should be, but should be in control. Our control. That is enlightenment.
The key of doing that is to be present in the present.

* Present is inevitable. Accept it.
(Vartman atal hai. Ise sweekar karo)

You want happiness.. but are you prepared for sadness?
* Opposite values are complementary to each other.
(Vipreet Paristhitiya Ek doosre ki poorak hoti hai.)

Introduction to a life changing activity: SoHam breathing exercise. A divine path to knowing self through meditation.

Day 3:
What is responsibility? and who takes responsibility? Responsibility is not given. It is taken, and whoever takes most responsibility is the most empowered person.

If you don't want to complain about life- take more responsibility towards it. Treat it more preciously. Increase your feeling of belonging towards yourself, your family, your present. This will ensure power and peace. As you will become more responsible, your complains will decrease.
The commitment of giving 100% to every waking moment is the art of living.
Expectations reduce joy and surprises induce joy!

Reached a new level of consciousness by SoHam.

Musings

2011-11-29T17:47:00.001+05:30

The illusion of control and the control that illusion has over us sometimes does a good deal of pushing us in a position where we think we can plan out our lives.

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Inspiration comes from within. The external things that seem to inspire us are just the water that helps the seed of inspiration within our souls to germinate.

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When I was a kid, moral science text books told me that God is everywhere. I did not like it then.. from where I was, I wanted God to be more tangible entity.. like God!.. but today, when I saw 7 superbly delicate white and dark green huge butterflies moving about in perfect synchronization, I sensed God. Right there. I was right. He is tangible and He is everywhere.

From Karla...with Love.

2011-11-24T12:05:00.001+05:30

"Most loves are like that ... You heart starts to feel like an overcrowded lifeboat. You throw your pride out to keep it afloat, and your self-respect and independence. After a while, you start throwing people out - your friends, everyone you used to know. And it's still not enough. The lifeboat is still sinking, and you know it's going to take you down with it. I've seen that happen to a lot of girls here. That's why I'm sick of love." ..

... Shantaram

Pasha!!

2011-11-21T23:46:00.001+05:30

He chews all the stuff I own...including my phone!! has done it...many times. He pees in my plants.. pads around with his muddy paws all over the white tiles before allowing me to wash them..
But he's who I allow even in solitude. He's truly my best friend :)
He's my pet dog, Pasha! and here's what his life around me is teaching me everyday..

Unlike us, Pasha does everything from the bottom of his heart! Whether he wags the tail or barks.Have you ever seen a dog that suffers from inferiority complex or ego problems? Have you ever seen a dog that pretends to be someone he is not? I haven't !

Here is a brief summary of “Pasha Pilanti” life lessons:
- Give and accept affection, freely and often;
- Always be curious about the world around you, especially when new people come into it;
- Take naps; Lots of them!
- Forgive friends who don't have time to play;
- Go out of your way if they do;
- Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joy-ride;
- Get the most out of the experience of fresh air and wind in your face;
- When family members come home, always run to greet them;
- Protect your territory;
- Run, romp, and play daily;
- Be loyal;
- Never pretend to be something you're not;
- If you want what is buried, dig until you find it;
- When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close and nuzzle them gently;
- Don't bite when a simple growl will do;
- On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree;
- When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body;
- No matter how often you're scolded, don't feel guilty and pout. Run right back and make friends;
- Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

To quote someone special, "Men as well as animals do whatever makes them happy, differences lie in what makes them happy" :)

References for pet lovers:
http://mysmelly.com/
http://www.quikr.com/pets-adoption-all/pets-adoption/z0?sx=true
http://www.petvacations.in/

Or you can post any query to me on comments and I'll do my best to help out ! :)

Be yourself - Graham Nash

2011-11-21T12:28:00.001+05:30

How does it feel , when life doesn't seem real
And you're floating about on your own
Your life seems uncertain
So you draw the curtain
Pretending there's nobody home
Don't theorize
Look in your eyes, they can't tell lies
though you may disguise what you see
The mirror is free
We once had a savior, But by our behavior
The one that was worth it is gone
Song birds are talking
And runners are walking
A prodigal son's coming home
Don't theorize
Look in his eyes
They won't tell lies
But if he defies what you see
He'll give you a key
Be yourself
We needed a tutor
So built a computer
And programmed ourselves not to see
The truth and the lying
The dead and the dying
A silent majority
Look in their eyes
Are they telling lies
The ones that they learn on T.V.
What a way to be free
Be yourself
Then you can free yourself
Free yourself
See yourself
Then you can see yourself
Come on and see yourself
See yourself

The End

2011-07-26T19:53:00.001+05:30

The things that happen and the things that don’t,
I can, I shouldn’t, I would, but I won’t!
How do they affect you my friend?
No matter what you choose, each story has the same end..

Yes, yes, the same end of the story!
You may have it good or bad or bright or gory,
Twists and turns and corners and even the bends,
But the fact shall remain and that’s how your story ends

My friend, my chum, my dearest mad hatter,
Don’t they say it’s not the destinations but the journeys that matter?
So what if the end is pre-arranged?
let the characters run wild go crazy, like absolutely deranged!

Even if the world’s a stage and us characters,
We following a script played a zillion times
Its always good to find new line that rhymes
It’s also good to know that its all ‘been there and that done’s
And comforting that we’re not the only ones

Still the stage can have props and colors new,
many many friends and foes quite so few.
Happy smiles and lots of claps,
Mad Hatter and me, funny chaps

Who cares what’s the end?
When already written is beyond our mend.
Truth is present and that means now,
End is fine, All the difference is made by how?

Another Goha !

2010-11-13T18:06:00.000+05:30

Goha ran inside his home and said to his wife, " The King spoke to me today !!"
"What did he say? "
"Get our of my way, you idiot !"

Goha and the shoes

2010-11-12T23:39:00.000+05:30

Goha was a generous and kind hearted, popular man. He was also target of continous practical jokes from his friends.
Once Goha's friends decided that they'd go over to his house pretending that he had invited them for lunch. On seeing his friends, he welcomed them, but was embarrassed when they told him that they were here for the lunch invitation! Goha ran inside to inform his wife of this. The wife exclaimed, "But Goha! There is no food in the house and no money too !! How could you not have informed me before!!? How can we have guests in the house waiting for the meal which will never come!".
Goha then appraised his wife, of his supposed mistake. The wife, more world wise knew immediately Goha to be innocent and saw through the trick his friends were playing. She told Goha the same who came up with a trick of his own !
He went outside, and collected all the shoes which his friends had removed outside the home before entering, sold those for money, bought food with that. Goha's wife prepared succulent dishes and desserts.
The friends who had been waiting for a long time now, ate and ate and ate until none could eat any more. Only then when they decided to leave, no one could find their shoes !!
"Where are our shoes", they asked of Goha, who then replied cheerfully "In your stomachs, dear friends !!"

Tell me a story!

2010-11-11T22:22:00.000+05:30

Once upon a time a monkey used to live on a tree on a river bank. The crocodile who lived in the river became friends with the monkey. The crocodile would give rides to the monkey in water and the monkey would give the fruits of the tree to the crocodile. One time, the wife of the croc said to him, "I feel like eating the heart of that monkey. Hmm.. It must be so yummy ! I just have to have that. Dear husband, why dont you get it for me? I have seen you giving rides to that little thing" When the crocodile retorted saying that the monkey was his friend, the wife got very angry and threatened to throw him out of the house.
Somehow the wife's threat won the moral battle over friendship in the crocodile's brain, and he went to the river bank and invited his friend, the monkey to come for his daily ride around the river.
The monkey, who by this time had come to trust his friend, didnt question when crocodile, instead of taking him back to the tree, steered towards his own home in the middle of the river.
After reaching in the Crocodile's home, the wife told the monkey that she was about to eat his heart. The monkey felt betrayed and hurt and very afraid, but did not lose his cool, and he said, "Oh ! Why didnt you tell me earlier, dear friend?? If I'd have known that your wife wanted to eat my heart, I would've brought it with me!"
The wife exclaimed, " What!! You left it home !!? "
The monkey, having realised that it was working, gained confidence and said, " Of Course !! My heart is so precious. I never carry it with me!. But since dear croc is my friend, you can surely have it! " .
The croc carried monkey back to his tree, and the monkey having learnt his lesson of trust, never looked back.

I love stories !
Apart from providing entertainment, they are the best learning tools invented by humankind. Just like a seed travels in the flesh of the fruit, a message needs a story to wrap it in its delicate folds, giving every member of the audiance the freedom to digest the message according to their power, strength and capability. Stories just give a bigger message than anything else.
These days when parents are busy and grandparents are away, the more common media of stories are books and movies.
I've personally always preferred books over movies. Books, because they give you the liberty to imagine, and create a world of your own in the framework of what is provided already! Movies- only some of them really hit home. Those are the movies for which we tolerate the rest of them.

Stories are part of us from even before we are born. The mystical connection, between us and the different stories cannot be understood in a day or a month or sometimes in lifetimes. Stories of love, friendship, morals, humanity, patriotism, kindness, wisdom, smartness, loyalty, truthfulness, bravery, faith, belief make us what we are, who we are. Stories have always been our tradition- The jatak kathayein, panchatantra, ramayan, mahabharat... these are the stories that surpass all dimesions of imaginations.
These stories should not be lost. These stories should not be seen, but read, and even better- be told and listened to.. this is our culture. This is our tradition.
These are what have made us what we are and tell us how we reached here. And we are on the verge of losing it all. Losing ourselves.

To be or not to be.

2010-11-10T22:16:00.000+05:30

Once upon a time there was, Abul, who was a servant in household of a wealthy merchant in Tanger in Morocco. One day, Abul came back from his daily visits to the suk, utterly petrified, pale faced and shivering with fear. Seeing this disturbed state of his usualy jovial attendant, the master enquired the cause of his dispair.
Abul replied " Master, I saw her!!.. I saw death herself !! Her face was white and she looked at me with the widest eyes. She has come for me, master!! I want to disappear from here. I want to run away form here!! "
The kind merchant gave Abul two of his fastest horses and money and bid him farewell.
Abul rode as fast as only a man escaping death can ride for two whole days and only then did he reach the coastal town of Safi. There, as he entered the stable to tie his tired horses, he saw her standing there, smiling, waiting for him. Abul asked, " How did you find me here!! " and she answered, " Dear friend, I was surprised to see you in two days ago in Tanjer! I feared you will be late for our appointment for today, right here. Now!"

One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it.

2010-05-23T20:16:00.000+05:30

A stitch in time saves nine.

2010-05-01T17:35:00.000+05:30

And a tooth filling in time will save nine thousand.

Well ! This new realization hit me today. On my visit to the dentist.

I am not the only person who procrastinates the visit to the dentist until arrival of the evil 'pain de gum'. Well..I'm not proud of it, but just as predictable as I am, I did not go the first time I experienced something funny in my upper jaw, and kept smiling . well, smiling is good, but not whilst ignoring what should be given priority numero uno.

I reached the dentist's office 5 minutes late, as ususal, but the receptionist was kind and instead of lecturing me for tardiness asked me to sit on the waiting couch. After waiting for 5 minutes in an okayish waiting room, I was lead to this blue walled room oooozing with smell of antiseptics.

Oh man !!.. This is it. I cringed as I sat on that chair surrounded by long metal tubes and pipes looking viciously like torture devices in some sinister hollywood movie. My overimaginative hyperactive super scared brain started to look out for blood stains and what not on the instruments. I had to conciously remind myself of why I am here.. and even if I had to sacrifice a few drops of blood to get rid of the PAIN, I was ready.

Few moments of tensed muscles and eyes super tightshut, and an amused smile from the doctor later, he got busy working on my teeth, and I got busy thinking, and relaxing for the first time in what seemed like a long time.

And I thought, why did I get so late in coming here? Obviously, when the brain is re-assured practically that there wont be any pain coming this way, it gets smart and starts thinking. And so did mine.

The root-canal question of the day is 'Why do we delay things that actually matter !?' What ARE the things that actually matter?

Well, listening to comments from the doc, dental health is not the most important thing in the life of IT proffessionals. But, generalising this a little more, are we wanting things in the correct order? Lets not use we.. I assume most people are brighter than me. But still, How many people even visit a doctor or a dentist until something itchy, bloating, feverish or painful starts to happen?

But then again, why should we go when we are perfectly fine!

How many times do you check the balance of your bank accounts in a month? Do you check it only if you are bankrupt and your debit/credit card wont swipe money out anymore? I think you get the point.

Well, today is the day, when even though ALL of those damage promising metal menace causing things have disrupted the tranquility of my mouth, but I DO feel better. Painless.

So, I think, no matter how busy our jobs, relationships, lives in general make us, we should once in a while stop and check the well being of those who actually support in all of our ups and down. Our real best friends. Our own Body and Mind.
With all that we put them through, I think they deserve it. :P

(Just my message to anywone who got to the bottom of this blog !)

Love stands.. alone

2010-04-06T23:08:00.000+05:30

Marriages are pre-ordained..
Who are you to judge the worth of the groom?
Rejecting the soothsayer's words
your daughter sits gazing
at the blue lillies of the spring
with a heavy heart and tearful eyes.
Her choice is not wrong.

- Kurunji ( her friend to her mother)

Settled? Hmm?

2010-01-04T23:39:00.000+05:30

<'Click here', and listen to it while reading this... that's how it was written. I hope you like it :) >

set⋅tle
1 /ˈsɛtl/ Spelled Pronunciation [set-l] IPA verb : settle down,
a. to become established in some routine, esp. upon marrying, after a period of independence or indecision.

Wow ! Congratulations!!!

These words ring out of my mouth quite not seldom these days as 3 out of every 5 phone calls I get in a day or similar random figure about emails, is to inform me/invite me to a wedding. I extend my best wishes with my cheery most voice, and why not! I'm happy for them. But every time the phone rings.. I'm like- Oh No! Not another wedding invitation!.. Not because that is some obligatory burden on me, per se.. but because, its almost always followed by an inevitable question- 'So, when are you getting settled?' Okay - pause - breathe in - breathe out- basically to prevent myself from retorting... Hey! I will when I will! How do I know! ... I always have to explain myself.

I went on to discuss this with my mother, and she too, world wise, tried to explain, 'Beta, this is the time to settle, proper age'. Maybe ... Maybe not..

Maybe because yea yeah... I know.. the reasons.. the biological clock .. because in India, an unmarried girl above 28 is stale goods..because it goes in synch with the plans your family has made etc etc..

Maybe not because... okay.. here, what I'm saying is my own opinon or maybe words really get to me. I hate the word 'settle' in this setting. I know it is meant in the other good way like house and family, but to me it sounds like - to settle.. same as to settle for something.. less.

Why should I 'settle' with someone I hardly know when I can gloriously fall in love with someone with whom I feel above and beyond petty worldy pleasure? Why cant I want to spent my entire concious and subconcious moment with the person, rather than have to 'settle' because I have to.

The catch is that I dont know if something like that really exists.. or is it the biggest scam thoroughly hyped by movies and songs and books duly taking advantage of our gullible souls.

What needs to be done to achieve that kind of higher being or is it all in our minds?

We all are hard wired and programmed to perfection that we believe that this is the right age to fall in love, so we do... this is the right age to marry... so we do. Those who dont have even that are incessantly complaining about the lack of a girlfriend/boyfriend in their life. But do we do all that out of an insane urge to be together with that person, or because we know that this is what they talk about, so this is what it must be?

Maybe all of them have got, what I have not.. maybe they were never searching for what I'm looking for.. or maybe they have convinced themselves that this is what and when they should settle with and for. I dont know.. It may also be that they all share a story too special to be told, although the cynical side of me barfs at the last one :)

Or maybe, it is expected out of you, as a result of your education and upbringing, that by this age you be wise enough to have found all the answers to your questions by now, hence forming your own philosophy and be ready to start another world of your own.

I don't know precisely at what point of time things changed, and instead of path makers we just became the path followers. I don't even know if I'm correct in contemplating all this.
I just know.. that I'm too unsettled to settle now.. or maybe.. I wouldn't settle for anything ..less.

A time for us..

Love is like a wrong turn.. on a cold night..

2009-10-17T10:23:00.000+05:30

In the days, in the flows of emotion.. you see God in the devil's eyes..
and you fall so far from grace... you wouldnt know a kiss if it were on your face....
you go tell it to the jury, but you AINT GOT NO CASE !! - Aerosmith

I love Aerosmith! :)

Again, at cross roads

2009-10-10T10:18:00.001+05:30

It is said that one see all kinds of times of fortunes and misfortunes at least once in a lifetime, ... like chicken pox. :P.
Our parents saw the china war, scarcity of food, mass unemployment, 2 wars with pakistan. That armed them with the kind of wisdom that gets you through the hardest of times. This all happened around them, but somehow, due to hard work and their own rules of survival, they came across to the new, comfortable world, unscathed but not unaffected. Many, many years went by, and the new generation was ready to go face the world. It was time for the elders to pass on their legacy - wisdom of survival to us. How to work hard, study like mental, rote-it-if-you-dont-get-it, get top grades so you can make a decent living. How to go fast, stress and stretch an inch more, Only dependable fields like science and medical to pursue. Go safe. They expect us to stick to their rules, because it got them cleared, through the mess they were in, so they would want the same for us too. But will we? Should we go fast or slow down a bit, should we think of capital, or global warming, should be binge or save? 1 kid or 2 kids? ... or maybe 3? Sports as career?

Our kind of mess is whole lot different from theirs and we have no idea how to tackle this. We are confronted with problem more complex than just decent living. The whole idea is to do more, be different. Now the goal is to be a better human being, make the world a better place, while not compromising on your high flying lifestyle. To maintain your body, gym, to learn the 'art of living', to do good for the society, to appreciate nature, to do simple things for a better cause, to know the deeper meaning of the things around us, to travel and know unknown people and places, to go beyond the I, me, myself. Now, THAT is decent living,

To rote what you don't understand doesn't get you anywhere these days. You actually have to think. And Think Hard. Intellect, no matter how ahead of your time, or how controversial is appreciated and rewarded, if not in your country, then in some others. The Global community roots for innovation and more effective, new paradigms. Due to advanced information technology, you are bound to strike your idea with someone or the other, who thinks like you.

This gives us a whole lot of new opportunities. Its like opening a google search page in your life, ...and you are free to explore whatever you want.

So even though we still have loads of problems - new diseases becoming epidemics, global warming, more frequent tornadoes and cyclones, terrorism, water scarcity, economic downturn- we are, like our elders learning the new tools of survival, and we always have theirs for the worst.

But the world is still a better place, thanks to them ..

to be cntd..

Nagala Hills: 3 Oct 2009

2009-10-04T12:41:00.000+05:30

My friends and I had the good fortune of going for our first trek together yesterday, to Nagala Hills.
Nagala Hills are located in Andhra Pradesh, and about 120 Kms from Chennai.
We were supposed to board our bus near the Guindy Flyover at 5:30 in the morning. Setting our feet out in the early morning, when the sky was still dark and air, crisp, we had no idea of what a bounty of adventure the day would bring.
We boarded the bus and joined even more people, almost giddy with anticipation.
The journey started.
We're a bunch of very lazy people, not used to being up so early, so only after some 30 minutes of friendly banter, we found ourselves lolling on the window glass, deep in sleep, and the mechanic drone of the bus on.
The bus stopped for allowing the trekkers some breakfast-fuel, and then again, the torpid journey resumed.
Suddenly, After I dont know how much time, the bus stopped and we were informed of our having reached our destination. "Wowie!!" I thought, and also tried to prepare for what lay ahead.
The trek starts with crossing of a dam. We needed to climb up and then down the dam. having made of loose red sand and stones, it was like climb up and down the steel slide of the ones we have in childrens' parks. Arul, our leader, expertly exhibited how to do it, and as he said, it was pretty easy to do but just scary to look at. Well, some unfortunate poor blokes came wearing floaters, and sandals. They had quite a scare climbing up and sliding down the 50-60 feet high dam of rubble.
After that we continued to climb steep up. Having been brought up in the mountains, I found all nostalgic, childhood memories, rushing back to me. The climb started with all groups joking around, and friends playfully teasing each other, but soon, most were found conserving their energy, for the tougher times ahead :) ... Trekking up the mountain, all we could hear was the silent hum of the wind, russel of leaves on the trees, an occasional crack of a twig, and sound of water cackling somewhere down. Oh! This is what heaven must feel like! Of course... remixed by the constant huffing and puffing of all of us :)
Within 2 hours of continuous climb, we reached the summit of the hill. Oh the view! Magnificent view, took of what was left of our breaths ... away!!
There we rested for about 15-20 minutes. Having gathered some energy back, suddenly all of the people clicking photographs in all possible combinations from all possible angles, made it quite a sight! :D . As if collecting proof!

Anyways, till then Arul had found the way to a stream. Hearing the name of a water body, all the fish in our group began jumping with d-lite :P And the prospect of climbing down a steep slope with only help of a rope didn't deter them at all.
Using the rope, we all went down the sharp side of the mountain, to discover a dream. If nature had to make a jacuzzi, it made sure only the worthy used it ;-)
With a lively brook collecting in a depression on the big rocks and moving ahead, this was an awesome sight, at the first of with, we all squealed like children and jumped into the waters.
After about 1 and a half hour of water games and royal jacuzzi treatment, we were somehow hoarded out of the water.
It was already 5 and we had to get out of the jungle before it got dark.
But the water had done its wonders, and everyone, with replenished energy, we started our way back.
This time, since we were already at the base of the mountain, we didn't have to climb up much, and in no time walking, talking humming and singing, under the marvelous pink sky, we reached the great dam of mud.
Some people just chose to slide their descent.. :) It was funny !

On returning, under the full moon of Ashwini Poornima, we congratulated ourselves on such a successful day and for having returned with having gained so many more new friends..

Fly away from here!!

2009-08-09T19:52:00.000+05:30

Gotta find a way....Yeah, I cant wait another day.. Aint nothin gonna change.. If we stay round here... Gotta do what it takes... Cuz its all in our hands ...We all make mistakes ...Yeah, but its never too late, To start again, take another breath......And say another prayer. And flyyyyy away from here - A/smith

Oh ! How much I love this song. Once, when I was flying from Pune to Delhi, just as the plane took off, Aerosmith blared 'flyyyy away from here' in my ear. Touche!

I love to travel. As a kid I wanted to become a traveller. I still want to, given a chance. I love to watch people. I like to explore through people and their stories. Its like when the God said, you have a Universe and all its answers inside you.

I've made my way throught the mist. I can see it clearing already :) . I'm finally being able to see through object by object, what I want.

It's an amazingly curious feeling ...

Aur Sunao!

2009-07-12T22:13:00.001+05:30

"The difference between news and gossip- News tells you what people did, gossip tells you how much they enjoyed it" - Shantaram

Gossip has been a part of Indian culture and routine.. since like.. forever. We even have stories of our Gods gossiping, and we are petty humans so we'll naturally do. But does that mean that we have STAY that way ?

In separate studies they've concluded that Indians are one of the most satisfied and least tensed cultures around the world. Outlook's magazine in its July edition, tells us that gossip is actually healthy!..
But its not gossip that bothers me. Its these two words. " Aur Batao"...

Its like scrapping the bottom of the gossip barrel.
"Dude! Show over! Go home! "
In this age, where you barely get the time for basics like sleep, food, family, how do people - 'Aur batao?'

Idle talk was good.. long .. long time back.
Everyone is SUPER-competitive these days. Especially at work. You'd rather take your reputation, put it in a soiled sock, dip it in grease, and throwing it at a pristine whitewashed wall, than utter these two words. The seriousness of these words hitting you back will be equivalent to the casual quotient of the phrase. Why! Even a lunch invitation from a friend has an agenda these days, except yeah, for obvious reasons like a birthday or something equally apparant.

I personally take these two words very badly, specially coming from people who I'm not very familiar with. I find it crude and rustic. It projects that this person feels as if I have nothing better to do than to entertain. Because you certainly have nothing to tell me, and I obviously have run out of things to talk about. End of conversation. Literally. But NO. Instead of putting a perfectly respectful conversation to a dignified end, you have to drag it around the courtyard.
Most people, unfortunately still use it as a conversation starter or conversation conjugative and become the unsuspecting victims of my wrath.

I dont know. I think even this attitude of mine is a little to the extreme side. People these days are so impersonal and cold, everywhere and everytime, that this can also be one pathetic little attempt of an entire generation to squeeze out, last of the indescribable warmth from each other. One little shrug/jerk towards back to being humans from the rational robots that we have started to become.

Sometimes I wish, everything'd go back to where it was, how it was. People wouldnt have such complicated issues because they'd still be worried about food and shelter.

Can't really decide which one is better.. after all, life isnt black and white.. its just shades of grey..

Fuzzy Logic

2009-06-25T22:07:00.001+05:30

Close your eyes and think of one thing you want the most.If you weren't able to see anything in a span of 10 seconds, "Welcome to the club". If you were able to see sometihng, please leave me a comment. You might be a major help !
When I close my eyes, I see only fuzz.

I cannot concentrate on any one thing at a time.When I think of what I want, instead of a single thing, I see white cloud, and some random stuff that I want floating around.How much does it take for order to kick in chaos? I think, how much of a mess, can I take before I start to clean up?Is it only me?

Am I alone in this? I hope it is only me.

The idea of an entire generation wandering in dark infinite space of time is more horrifying than I can imagine.I was thinking on a high level, of the attitude change, over past few generations. Girls think unlike gender opposite, more in control and always the closest to the "Book Of Standard Behaviour". That has been coming over generations. But in the past few years, this attitude has totally changed. Girls and women enjoy more power and comfort. They also enjoy more "loss of control" and adrenaline rush.So, yeah, if during the past few years the boys have become more understanding and closer to the codes of behaviour, the girls have just started their roller-coaster ride.Maybe this is where chaos enters our life. With no controller negetive feedback, our circuit will go crazy, with amplified current each time it completes the loop.

Then the always-a-million-dollar-question arises who or what will put an end to this madness!Do we need an accident or a personal tragedy to help us come out of coma and see sense?Even if we do, how is it that we fail to act? Even if we take the immense initiative and start it, does that idea even see it's prime? Or does it always remain a whimper, a sad little sound in the mad world of disorder?

I might be wrong, and things might not be really so bad, our own little lives.

I Miss You

2009-04-11T02:09:00.000+05:30

What is space? Is it created by presence of absence, or absence of something?

If we are so fond of space, why do we clutter the space around us, only to miss the empty space later.
Inspite of my simultaneous opposite cravings , why are my phone bills on a constant rise these days? Why do I allow some people to come so close to me, that I start missing them even when they leave a gap for air to breathe? The void, which eventually gets filled, hurts almost physically, in the present. It robs the brain of its power to think constructively and rationally. And it deflates the spirit. The void becomes so huge that it sucks everything from your life, and still be a void. I like to take chances. I would like to take chances on the sadness in future, if it is worth the happiness right now.

"meinu jadvi tussi ho yaad aaye, din dihade mein sharab le baitha"..

Mixed Signals

2009-04-11T01:55:00.000+05:30

Where are the simple days when one person had one phone and one sim-card?
One sim-card on which he could always be reached(or at least whenever reachable).In this pro-capitalistic, pro-consumerist era, gloating about the plethora of choices, have we, the focus of all processes,the so-called middle class common population lost the idea of what we actually want?It seems like we are so taken in by the shiny nice attractive offers, that we lose the vision of what we came out looking for.
On second thoughts, is that even a real reason, or just a second grade excuse? An excuse for our greed. Greed of more. More of everything.
They say life gives you what you want. I've asked a lot of people I know about what they want, that if only they wanted one and only one thing, what would that be. I've not got even a single straight forward answer. My search is still on.
They say that if you really want something, the whole universe conspires for you to get it. But most of the times, our mixed signals to life get all cross wired and result in a wholly new requirement.But I know that even if we see so many cases otherwise in our life, there are some awesome people I know who have completely sorted lives.
For people who ask, " When does it get better?", the answer is "Never".
So the possible solution is to sync your random requirements in the same bandwidth, and send your amplified signals to the cosmic space, hoping the saying about life comes true.
I'm told they've already released the phones with dual sim-cards.

My new life

2009-01-12T18:12:00.000+05:30

These days Uncle Murphy and Aunt un-luck have developed special affection for me. I hate them. Both of them.

After messing up CAT and all of the other exams by some one or two questions each, and my one year's hard work down the drain, just when I thought it could not get any worse, I got released from my project. Again, my die hard optimist right side of the brain, told my more logical left side of the brain of the small silver lining. You know, the exposure to new projects, people and technology, and if Im lucky, new country! And then lo! I got an interview call, on the day of my release! The sun was shining and the day looked all bright and lovely ! My plan of a fresh start was already on its way! My new desk , and my new colleages, new place, fresh start. Yay!!
And then boom.. boom.. BOOM... Bhadaak.. fzzz....

My interview lasted for complete 90 minutes, and I dont really remember much of that. I was busy dodging the mean question bombs and land-mines. I could not BELIEVE my luck. Why o why!

By the time I was done with my fiasco of an interview, the sun wasn't shining any more, and all I could hear was the buzz of the air conditioner, and distant sound of horns of passing vehicles.

I was left wondering, sometimes one gets so much for little petty change.

Risky Business

2008-12-25T22:13:00.000+05:30

What is a risk? More importantly, why is it even needed to be taken, if we are perfectly happy the way we are?

The answer could hold roots in the fact that, no life is perfect, no country is safe and no business is ever flourishing. Call of duty, will to survive, just the urge to excel or some unfathomable caprice pushes all of us living beings into inviting that flirtatious temptress(risk) onto our doorsteps.

A ship cannot refute the basic purpose of its existence just because it might have to sail through rough weather. A soldier cannot sit in the safety of home. An industry cannot be stagnant.

On one side there are most of us, who fear risk, and that fact is wholly and truly appreciated by the entire Insurance Industry and a lot inter-related sub-industries. And then there are others, who take outrageous chances and audacious steps.

There are a lot of examples where one small careful step salvaged the entire organisation, and on the other hand when an almost a quixotic deal, became the most important and successful one in the life history of the enterprise. There are ferocious advocates to both sides of the argument as to which one is the wisest way to grow, but what is mutually agreed by both, is the need to understand and manage risk.

World economies, disturbingly interconnected, resemble dominoes, one falls, all fall. In these times, no foolhardy steps are acceptable. So new world peace is risk assessment,mitigation plans, and risk retention to be part of daily business jargon.

I believe, if there is an obvious storm, the shrewdest will hold their precious ship in the harbour, or may by de-tour. The catch is to know, when and where is the storm coming.

Retail Therapy - To be or Not to be ?

2008-12-13T12:49:00.000+05:30

Oct 2007
Mom: "New Shoes?? Once more? But you bought one pair only last week !!? "
Me: "Mom!! I saw these .. and just couldnt stop myself!!"

"True debauchery is liberating because it creates no obligations. In it you possess only yourself; hence it remains the favorite pastime of the great lovers of their own person." Albert Camus (1913-1960). French-Algerian philosopher, author. [The narrator, Jean-Baptiste Clamence] The Fall (1956).

Oct 2008

Mom: "New Shoes !? "
Me: "yeah.. after 1 hour of soul-searching(also for a cheaper pair), I thought I could live with 'em"

In this new age of free falling economies, the dilemma is marked by pandemic post-purchase rationalization by non-chronic self confessed shopoholics (me?).

Post-purchase rationalization is a common phenomenon after people have invested a lot of time, money, or effort in something to convince themselves that it must have been worth it. Many decisions are made emotionally, and so are often rationalized retrospectively in an attempt to justify the choice.

Psychologically, in the phase before purchasing, the prospective buyer (moi) feels the positive emotions associated with the purchase like desire, a sense of heightened possibilities, and an intimation of the enjoyment that will accompany using the product( all these gorgeous things are going to mine mine mine!! wow!! ): afterwards, having made the purchase, he or she (or me) is more fully able to experience the negative aspects: all the opportunity costs of the purchase; and the reduced purchasing power remaining.(shit shit shit!!! why did I have to!.)

Before the act, one has the full array of options, including not purchasing; afterwards, one's options have been reduced to two: a) continuing with the purchase, surrendering all alternatives, or b) renouncing it (never). So that before purchasing, one experiences oneself as acting in a virile way, creating a situation; while afterwards the time of acting has passed: one is deflated and experiences oneself as having been acted on by the former virile self; one feels bound by one's remaining limited choices.

Buyer's remorse can be caused or increased by the knowledge that other people will later question the purchase or claim to know better alternatives.(You bought this in Rs 150?? I got it in Rs30 at Googi's store!)

Extreme shopping activity and any associated remorse is, again, probably a sign of some deeper disquiet and normal "buyer's remorse" should not be confused with the complex emotional dynamics of "shopaholic" behaviour, no more than eating too much on special occasions should be confused with a serious eating disorder such as bulimia.

To all the shopophilic men and women:
As I have already established that "shopping" which we women so gleefully pronounce is not always the most delightful thing we do.

To all the shopoholic men and women:
A purchase, unlike many decisions in life, is invariably either reversible or at least recoverable and should not be a source of enormous anxiety.

:)

Who's Blank?

2008-11-26T19:51:00.000+05:30

Usually I like to be comfortably blank after a gruelling day at work. Yes. My days of endless monotonous meetings, crazy requirement documents, mundane training sessions DO get tiring. So I like my blank peace after work.

But when I do that, I cannot really tell a day from the other. My last two years at my current job have passed in a whir. Even though my daily activities earn revenue for my company and mealticket for me, it is very difficult to actually write down in bold points about what exactly have I done in all this time.

I had a complete list of things in college about " what I'd like to do when I'll start earning". Two years hence, not much has changed.

From this I have derived that one can be successfully dedicated only to one thing at a time.
In this world of multi-processing and multitasking we try to customize ourselves to this structure of parallelism. But it is very important for us to realize that just like the solar system has only one sun, we should also have only one orientation, and the whole big picture should be according to that orientation. Be it spiritual or country or self or family. Anything!

If that doesnt happen and we keep penduluming between different objectives, our beautiful big picture will resemble more of a molasses rather than a landscape.

As multi-meaning as it can sound, the question of the day is :
Whats your orientation? ;-)

Mutual Investments

2008-06-15T16:53:00.000+05:30

Family, friends, relatives, acquaintances, pets are euphemisms for investments. Our investments in our fellow beings, in order of the returns.
This is not new or even bad.. It has always been like this. From the times of the neanderthal man to the Gucci-clad new-age man.

A whole big bank of favour runs, having branches and outlets everywhere. I dont even want to get down to start explaining how everyone invests in everyone else and how are the returns are encashed.

Some people, very few and rare species are also the philanthropists. Ones who emanate genuine warmth and kindness, without expecting returns. Huh.. they must have a lot stored already.!

The dour effect of inflation has not spared even this face of our already wilted interests. As our daily needs and commodities are getting dearer, so is our capacity to give. Come to think of it...we dont need to GIVE anything. These times have already toughened up people. Inspite of that, everyone has some weak moments. Maybe their only sign of being a human, as most of the times everyone is busy pretending to be the most competent robot of the army or most funny colleague, or most happening teenager, or.. the list goes on.

That weak moment. That little window. So brittle, that one could break.. All that is needed at that time is for people to be kind. And since we cannot trust strangers to be kind to us, we invest in our people to return us with kindness. That is all. All the hodge-podge of all relationships that we have, boils down only and only to this.

My point is that: We dont need to give anything to anyone.
A simple smile or a thank you or a helping hand can make anyone's day. If someone falls.. dont laugh. Help him up. Thats the way it is.
So.. to make a very long sentence short:

Be kind.

Think about it.

2008-05-17T14:28:00.000+05:30

"Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory" or so said Albert Schweitzer

United in Hate

2008-03-06T22:55:00.000+05:30

Today I am about to moot a topic, that has been on my mind for a long time now.
Why is it easier to express hate or dislike?

How many times do we actually think before we pass a judgement? Let us chew over this for a little while.

One possible reason can be the urban-race. It is the race of doing more things in least time. Modern day man does not have time to ponder over things, wasting time deciding worth of the effort. Do the fastest thing and get over with it is more like it.

Three steps to sorting.
See. Assess. Reject.
"Reject".
It could also have been other way round. See. Assess. ‘Accept’. But I guess no one has the time to take the risk of the time that will be wasted in liking something. Specially if is actually IS a waste.

Another reason can be the need to belong in a category or a class. This sometimes leads to projection of false standards. Because a thing is generally looked down upon by a certain cosset, you cannot take risk of falling OUT of the clique you have chosen for yourself. Expressing to like something, which not necessarily maintains a good reputation in your 'group', can sometimes do exactly that. Let me illustrate an example:

Imagine yourself vaunting your likes for "Himesh Reshammiya branded music concert" to your posh friends talking about the latest Aerosmith concert. You done even like Aerosmith !! and you love Himesh’s music!
Why? Is this another side effect of the 'urban-race'?

A third reason can be emotional immunity. General belief of emotions are only the 'tender' kinds of emotions. Eg: Love, friendship, liking, nostalgia etc. Few open minded scholars will put anger, dislike and similar emotions first on the list. Now, the point I’m trying to establish is that, in today's age, Public Display of Emotion is allowed only on cricket field. If you do that, it is contretemps and basically the hottest gossip-topic of the day. Any emotion. Especially extreme ones like hate OR love. I also once read somewhere, that every negative word vibrates in your brain about ten thousand times more than a positive word.

Maybe that explains why we believe only the worst reviews. It might also explain why it is so easy to forget good things about a person/place, while the bad thing, (even if only one!) just refuses to leave comforts of memory.
So when you get to know someone who actually hates something you hate too, that is the root of new-age camaraderie. :)

Rearranging my 'closet'- Title song.

2008-01-16T23:56:00.000+05:30

As a lot of new stuff comes in our lives, we have to rearrange our current stuff to make room for the new stuff to fit in.

A relationship comes with its own set of baggage and luggage, which all has to be let in, as you let the person in.There are habits to be readjusted, space to be given and taken, people and time to be shared. A decision box always stays in the flowchart of our process of a relationship.

A lot of energy is invested in .... and we keep doing that.. continuously readjusting to the new baggage, and continuously assessing, is it all worth it? The day/event/moment the balance on the other scale outweighs the weight on the worth is, the relationship is out and in is a whole lot of experience from it, and maybe... a better person(or bitter?).

But sometimes, the scales don't matter, the flowchart that so logically conducts your actions gets unbalanced. Sometimes you do what you want to, while the scales dictate otherwise. All you want to see is a smile, a twinkle and all the world in the space of your heart gets balanced.

That is love.... I don't mind rearranging my closet a little for that :) Do you?